My Online Dating Mistakes… (Video)

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When I first started online dating I made so many rookie mistakes. I chose the wrong site, put up the wrong pics and said the wrong things. If you’re trying to get boo’d up in 2014 and online dating is part of your plan, these are the things not to do! Feel free to share your online dating mis-steps below… each one, teach one!

Mistake #1 I paid for online dating sites – in the end I had the most fun meeting guys on free sites. I was able to cast a wide net and I didn’t see every connection as something I had paid for which made things feel a bit more organic.

Mistake #2 I only put up one perfectly cropped, high angle, boobs and face only picture – Once I learned to put multiple pictures on my profile, the guys I met in person were never surprised by my size. This made my in person dates much more relaxed. We are the size we are… the guys who skip us because they see our full body pics aren’t the guys who we need to be dating anyway… Don’t forget, guys do photo trickery too… remember the guy who had no teeth? Well, his photos hid that very well!

Mistake #3 I was so confused by the online dating “lingo” and I said things on my profile that made me seem… um… fast - When my profile made it seem like I only wanted to hook up, guys definitely treated me that way. Oops!

What online dating mistakes have you made?

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  • vanessa jackson

    Be creative with your profile … don’t use the typical stuff that everyone else uses, like I like long walks on the beach, shopping and movies and dinner. Everyone says that…if you do use it make sure something up top catches their attention. I also added I “don’t send sexy photos” meaning no candid shots of my private parts which I have been asked for on several occasions and I’m in my late 40′s and grown men do this too.

    • thebiggirlblog

      Good suggestions :-) And we definitely need to talk about the pics request thing… It’s out of hand!!!

      • vanessa jackson

        I guess I should have added n no pics of their parts either!!! Whats up with that???

        • thebiggirlblog

          DONT GET ME STARTED!

          • GinaS13

            Yes, girls, do any of you like that? I don’t know any myself. Men are so odd sometimes.

  • http://lessofless.blog.com/ Less

    A guy with no teeth? Now that sounds like a winning date. I’ve been thinking out paying for a dating site, but maybe I should hold off and explore the free sites a bit more.

    • thebiggirlblog

      LOL! It was pretty interesting…

  • c2268

    I’ve had the opposite experience with sites. I found the free ones to be terrible. I was constantly being contacted by felons and liars. I won’t pretend to have met the man of my dreams on a pay site (the only one I tried was Black People Meet.com), but they were definitely better than the ones I met on POF.Com. Unfortunately, I haven’t had much luck with online dating. Almost all of the men I’ve met have been shy and socially awkward. I just can’t handle that. But, it’s always interesting to read someone else’s positive experience.

    • thebiggirlblog

      POF is rough but my friend met her amazing husband on there, so who knows! I feel like my experience was positive because I wasn’t her looking for “him” ya know? I was just dating for fun… The good old days lol

      • Vanessa

        I met my Fiance on POF and we’ll be getting married in 5 months! That being said, we joke/gringe, when we tell people we met on that website because before we met each other we had met some doozies off that site. But again, it goes to show that you can’t give up, had we, we would’ve never met each other and THAT would’ve been a shame.

  • c2268

    By the way, I think you’re awesome. I saw you on Amanda’s channel and had to start reading your blog. You (and Amanda) are just bursting with positivity. You’re also very beautiful. Please keep up the good work.

    • thebiggirlblog

      Such kind words, thank you soooo much!! xoxo

  • LaVonna Sky

    I haven’t had any luck on the paid or free sites. I just gave up on dating period. I’m an introverted person so if online dating wouldn’t work for me, I know meeting someone in a casual setting is not going to work,

    • thebiggirlblog

      Give up dating, but stay open to whatever comes your way. Rumor has it that things come together when we stop looking… ;-)

  • PinkPanther

    I wrote too many things about me in the profile, so the guys didnt know what to ask :( But I´ve learned from it :)

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  • http://www.krymeariver.com/ Krystal

    Thank you for the suggestions. I must admit though I’ve been online dating for over a year and I haven’t had much luck on okcupid or plenty of fish. I’m trying out match and seeing if that’ll be better. I’m hoping if people actually pay for it they actually want to date instead of just hook up :(

  • Sophie

    Thanks for sharing your experience, I’ve had been more lucky because one of my friend has recommended me be2, it’s a trustful website !

  • acousticsoul

    Yes, I had the same experience with POF. Talk about sleazy! But funny thing, as soon as I was deciding to sign off the site for a break, I met my current partner. Online dating is a tricky process, with many, many, many highs and lows. The thing is to try and enjoy it, and when you think you need a break, take it. Trust.

  • Jerry Flint

    Great advice about using full figure photo’s.. It’s irritating to meet someone who doesn’t look like they portrayed themselves. You’re absolutely correct about it causing the first meeting to be tense. Thing is most of the larger women I met I would have gone out with anyway but after finding out that they had misrepresented themselves rather than thinking about going out again I usually thought about how fast I could end the date.

    I get that people want to make a good impression but essentially misrepresenting oneself is a lie. If I’m sitting across from you and I know you’ve lied to me about this I’ve got to wonder what else about you is a lie. It also screams that you’re insecure and not comfortable about who you are. If you don’t like yourself why should I?

    I found that I preferred pay sites.. my feeling was that if people are spending money to be on the sites they are more serious about meeting someone. It’s been 5 years since I’ve been on a dating site so maybe things have changed.

    I was just out of a 25 year marriage when I got on my first dating site and I just wanted ‘friends’ was not at all ready for a serious relationship.. well I made a lot of friends and despite how up front I was about my desire to become friends only seemed like most of the women I met wanted to get serious. The fact that I continued to go on dates with other women some didn’t deter the women who wanted to be serious. A few years and a few hundred dates later I was feeling ready to settle down.. Problem was living in a smaller town I had ran through all of the women in the dating pool & realized some of my previous friends were exactly what I was looking for but by now they weren’t interested in me.. moral of the story slow it down..

    I learned real fast about serial daters, you know the ones that say an ideal date is dinner and a broadway show for a first date guys treat.. no thanks.. if we click and I want to impress you maybe.. but if you’re letting men you just met spend a few hundred bucks on you you’re a pro and most likely not someone I want to get to know.

  • nana

    i wanted to know whats a good dating site i can go on because im a very shy young lady and meeting someone is kinda hard for me