The weirdest part about getting to know Kevin long distance is how I look forward to phone calls from him like I’d look forward to a date with someone local. During the week, we talk for about 30 minutes when I get home from work, the gym etc. and on the weekends, we can talk longer and later because I don’t have to be in bed by a certain time. With Kevin being 3 hours behind I can also keep my social schedule intact. I can go out with friends and even if I get home after 2am, Kevin and I can still talk for a while. These types of evenings are becoming routine for us.
Like last Friday, I had dinner/drinks with some girlfriends, got home around 1am (10pm Kevin’s time) and was still able to curl up in my bed and talk to him until a little after 3am. This wasn’t a problem because I could sleep in as long as I wanted the next day. Well, that was the plan….
My phone rang at 12:45pm and I was still asleep. I groggily reached over to hit the “ignore” button, but when I lifted the phone off of my nightstand I saw Kevin’s name (and a cute photo of us) flashing on my screen.
“Hey mister, is everything alright?”
“Yeah… I’m fine. I’m at the hospital.”
I sat up in my bed. “What happened?”
“I had my basketball game this morning and I messed up my ankle. It might be broken.”
“Oh my gosh,” I said.
Kevin wouldn’t know what was going on until he was seen by the doctor, so I just stayed on the phone with him until his name was called. Although I had planned to sleep later, I was already awake, so I got out of bed to start my weekend chores, run some errands and wait to hear back from him.
Dating in New York has put me in a constant state of ambivalence. I try not to get my hopes up about anything because its been my experience that things can fall apart as quickly as they develop. I’ve had guys call after dates and ask to see me again and then… I never hear from them. While I say I’m excited to explore things with Kevin; each time we hang up in the back of my mind I wonder if he’s going to call again. Then when he does call, I’m pleasantly surprised. Needless to say, I’ve remained in a very guarded space.
I think that’s why it wasn’t until I was scrubbing my bathtub that I realized; perhaps I shouldn’t brush off this particular phone call.
A few years ago I got sick and ended up in the hospital for a week (I’ll tell you that story another day). Even though I was scared and sometimes bored, I didn’t call every single person in my phone. Instead I called a few select people who were important to me.
Kevin calling me during an “emergency moment” is kind of a big deal. It speaks to where he’s placed me in his life.
Maybe its time for me to give real thought where he stands in mine.